Carpet, drapes, match

The story:
Britney Spears shaved her head and got a couple of new tattoos over the weekend.


The combatants:
Agent Bedhead says: Britney Spears is now bald all over
A Socialite's Life says: The unraveling of Britney Spears
Cele|bitchy says: Britney Spears loses her sh*t, hair
Celebrity Hijinx says: Britney is bald
Defamer says: Newly bald Britney Spears makes tragically unfashionable cry for help in the valley
Dlisted says: Let the ratty wig wearing begin!
Egotastic says: Britney Spears bald: she shaved her own head
Faded Youth says: Britney goes bald
Haute Gossip says: Britney's lost the plot
Hollywood Rag says: Britney Spears shaves head for a wig
I Don't Like You In That Way says: Britney Spears is a bald-headed nightmare
Lainey Gossip says: Britney: the breakdown
Mollygood says: Britney's publicist says, "F&ck it!"
Popsugar says: Britney shaves her head
The Superficial says: Britney Spears shaved her head completely bald
Tabloid Whore says: Britney Spears shaves her head
What Would Tyler Durden Do says: Britney's big night out
Yeeeah says: Britney Spears is f-ing bald

Who said it best:
Everyone is speculating what brought about this latest cry for help, but Celebrity Hijinx seems to have found the answer:

Havin' hair and two kids is hard y'all.

Image via People

GQs obsession

The story:
GQ magazine named Lindsay Lohan their Obsession of the Year.

The combatants:
Agent Bedhead says: Lindsay Lohan, one pissed off bitch
CelebNewsWire says: GQs a little obsessed with Lohan
Celebrity Hijinx says: WT not GQ
Defamer says: GQ reveals Lindsay Lohan's post-clubbing ritual
Dlisted says: Blohan in another slutty photoshoot
Egotastic says: GQ says they are obsessed with Lindsay Lohan and so am I
Mollygood says: Autoerotic conflagration
Popsugar says: Lindsay is GQs obsession of the year
The Superficial says: Lindsay Lohan is a sarcastic bitch

Who said it best:
Dlisted lets us in on LiLo's celebratory secrets:

GQ named Lindsay Lohan its “Obsession of the Year” and she celebrated by opening her legs and bending over for a photoshoot.

She looks clean anyway

The story:
Courtney Love has a new book out, and is sporting a new look while out doing PR.


The combatants:
A Socialite's Life says: Courtney gives blonde pirates a bad name
Dlisted says: Note to Courtney: glasses don't always make you look smart
The Gilded Moose says: Breaking: Courtney Love intelligent
Haute Gossip says: If THIS is what sober looks like...
Mollygood says: Are we sure that Courtney Love is sober?
Popsugar says: The Courtney Love diaries
Tabloid Whore says: Dirty Blonde: The Diaries of Courtney Love hits stores today

Who said it best:
The Gilded Moose doesn't Love the new look:

You know we love this woman more than Cold Stone itself, but she is seriously just two bad sitcom punchlines away from becoming Tina Yothers again.

Image via Haute Gossip

Verbal diarrhea

The story:
Lindsay Lohan had some interesting comments in a recent interview with News of the World.


The combatants:
A Socialite's Life says: Lindsay Lohan talks eating disorders...supposedly
Celebrity Hijinx says: Firecrotch has diarrheamouth
Egotastic says: Lindsay Lohan admits to drugs, anorexia, bulimia and sluttiness
Popsugar says: Lindsay won't stop believing
The Superficial says: Lindsay Lohan tells all

Who said it best:
Celebrity Hijinx knows where LiLo's chattiness is coming from:

Basically we can sum up this whole interview with "Please mommy, pay attention to me."

Image via I Don't Like You In That Way