Becoming a mean material girl

The story:
Madonna has dumped Britney Spears and is now taking Lindsay Lohan under her wing.

Image via Haute Gossip

The combatants:
Mollygood says: Soon Lohan will know the value of Madge's teachings
Best Week Ever says: Lohan is Madonna's next apprentice
Tabloid Whore says: Madonna hanging with Lohan? Um, don't think so...
Dlisted says: Madge's next victim
Glitterati Gossip says: Madonna breaks up with Britney
I Don't Like You In That Way says: Madonna has a new minion
The Superficial says: Madonna puts the moves on Lindsay Lohan

Who said it best:
IDLYITW seems certain that Lindsay will fill the Kabballah void for Vadge:

You don't need to be on drugs to see how spiritually fulfilling channeling the powers of a red string is, but it would probably help, so Lindsay should do fine.